Captain’s Log, Parenthood Date: 831

Our time here has been well spent, learning to interact with the tiny native who inhabits this island, known to us now as Sassquatch. We have been teaching her our language, as my Co-Captain and I hope to prepare her for an eventual introduction into society. However, I fear that civilization will never accept her. Though she seems more visually attractive by the day, somehow she regresses in her behavior by the hour.

To add to our burden, a second tiny native appeared on the island today. This one is a male, presenting challenges we have never before faced. We have worked hard, but now must start again. I only hope Sassquatch will not regress further upon interaction with this new tiny native. Already she has resorted to kicking and screaming upon the floor.


Captain’s Log, Parenthood Date: 1

I am writing this too late. We are now immersed in life on this island, with no foreseeable escape. This entry has been backdated for my records, and for the knowledge of anyone else who might one day stumble upon the island, long after we are gone.

It has been a long, arduous journey to this island. My Co-Captain and I seem entirely alone, with the exception of one very tiny native. She is small, but loud, and intent on clinging to us every second. The fact that she is also charming does not assuage my concerns. Though she cannot speak, I see mischief in her gaze.

We are trapped.